One of the greatest differences between rules and relationship is that rules cause stagnation. They establish a series of laws of guidelines; within which is absolute right and outside of which is absolute wrong. They create a box or a standard that takes something organic, a process, a journey and make it black and white, requiring no grace, only stamina, perseverance and death to self continuously.

Rules are not easy to keep, they keep every record of wrong, they judge and point out flaws, they are merciless in the clarity of the mirror they hold up and they condemn

every

single

time.

We know this. We know that they suck because of this. But I put forward another thought…

Rules - when kept - tell that individual that they are now ok. That where they are is acceptable and a picture of all that is right. They tell them that they are now good, that they have achieved their goal. The person moves from a place of process and condemnation…

…to a place of maintenance.

This is almost more detrimental than the condemning, unachievable standards that rules instill. Why? Because we settle. We stop. We maintain. We have no more reason to pursue the more because we have achieved our goal with our measure of perfection.

Relationship, however, does not judge wrong and right in the same way. Love and grace cover everything, they do not call out something as despicable, unforgivable or unworthy. Relationship simply loves on, walks with and calls out the truth knowing that somewhere along the line, love always will out that which is tormenting and trialling.

Relationship applauds the process

and love motivates a desire to pursue even better.

I have been struggling in many areas over a long enough time that sometimes I find myself wondering "well, if I am not giving into temptation in this area, which is therefore not a sin, am I now ok? is this ok? this is obviously "just part of me" and always will be".

The rules that say "don't give into temptation" say yes, this is fine, stay in these rules and you are good. Maintain this position and you will be holy and continue as a good person. with stamina, checking and religious rule keeping you will find that the maintenance program will keep you in the "right" and not straying into the "wrong". Black and white.

It is only love, relationship, grace, that says "it is not ok" but not out of judgement or because its a sin or its wrong or anything like that. It is not the black and white of "you are wrong because this is wrong". No. I believe that love says that it is not ok to get to this point and just avoid temptation and class it as always being part of you,

because... it is not ok to settle.

More importantly than anything you might be facing, dealing with, feel is part of you and you don't want it to be, sin stuff, whatever. More importantly than the black and white of whether its right or wrong, where the boundaries are, how close to perfection you are yet. More important than all of that is learning that love celebrates the process, applauds you on the journey and calls you through love to press in deeper, higher, nearer. It calls out your destiny, that there is more, that there will always be more. It does not call you to a goal, to an achievement, to a place of maintenance. But love calls you to the pursuit.

Destiny is not a destination

It is a pursuit.

May we never, ever get in the trap of condemnation through falling short of a perceived goal that in our black and whiteness needed to achieve to be able to stay in God's good books.

Would we realise that the privelidge is in the pursuit of destiny in the midst of our failings, pressing upwards purely because of the love we have for the one who cheers us the loudest and will always love us, regardless of anything we do or feel. Would we, the most, start to celebrate our journeys, other people's journeys.

It is not either or; black and white, right and wrong, in or out, achieved or failed.

It is and and more - love covers everything and does not judge, does not care whether you passed or failed.

But loves every single step of every single journey.