Baptised
6 hours after it began, church and baptismo's finished and we ate rice and beans. I sit outside, Esperanza to my left (shes my girl that I have bonded so closely with, such depth and haunting beauty but such hidden pain and torment, oh Jesus), the Pemba breeze slowly licking my drying sea hair, shell shocked, overwhelmed, not understanding, not knowing what comes next, only knowing i love the girl to my left, the kids to my right, the group behind me and the place they call Pemba and Arco-Iris. If there was a significance to all those rainbows, maybe this was it, i do not know. What do i know? I have been here 27hours and I have gone form numb and surreal to ....something and surreal! This morning, we had church, we worshipped, watched kids on their faces, literally, praising Jesus, danced, prayed, joyed...mama aida spoke of testimonys of what she has seen the lord do healings and such and then did an altar call before we all went to the beach for the three hour baptism service.
In short, everyone who was baptised, kids from 6-15 yrs, adults, me and mum and some other visitors, by mama Aida were ALL overcome by the presence and spirit of God on return out of the water, right there an then in the sea. Previous baptisees floated away in the arsm of others, oblivious to all but the love and joy of Jesus in response to their death to flesh and commitment of their lives to Him. Before long my spirit had quickened and God called me to get in the water which for some reason really scared me, i think the last dregsof demons were creaming at me to run away but I didnt wann be caught up by them, nor was i gonna be caught up in legalism having already been baptised aged 12. God told me to jump into the waters of his love and blessing and burial, so i did. What love mama Aida posesses! In so mcuh as whenever anyone is near her, they wanna be loved, they love, thye seek healing and receive it, they share testimony, they love. She spoke over me that God makes all things new and that today was a new day hallelujah :) As I came up fromt he water the Spirit...oh the Spirit took over and I shook and felt Him so deep inside I was overwhelmed and could do nothing but float in Heidis arms are she spoke in the langauges of heaven over me and kissed my head. Then i was enveloped in His joy, it consumed me, i laughed, glowed according to three different people who later sought me out to tell me! Oh but how to keep a hold of it, permamnce Lord! Dont let this just be a break in the clouds! I wont let it be! my life has changed, let it never ever go back to how it was. Mum was baptised too, we have pics of both which i will try and figure out how to blog, she glowed as well, physically glowed. :)
This is the point at which nothing else can be verbalised or explained. I sit here numb and yet full of emotion, unsure right now how to keep this, how to not let it slip, how to even process what just happened, what it means int he course of my life....God is doing great works between me and my mom on this trip as well, I look forward to seeing the Lord being greater revelation love and breakthrough with us.
Beyond all of this though, beyond my current thoughts about future,, i observe what I see here, i watch mama aida, i feel what God poured into me today and I am left with a profound and life changing question. How do we love, no matter wat, when or who, with the love and passion of Christ?
There is more wrestling in me but I leave it within me so that the LOrd can minster and answer.
Below I have written some tesimonys from this morning although I also include a diary entry after this one from Heidi about this morning.
-woman told by doctor to eat her family to get well (by witch doctor) didnt, instead asked Jesus and was healed
- man alcoholic then had aids then DIED...raised from the dead and well
- deaf hearing
- alcoholic cured
- sickness cured
- one woman came to Christ and her family so scared that the demons would kill them as a result (she was delivered).
That is not the greatest measure of stories I have heard and testimony to the drak and light contrast here, but ther are somethings it is worth not knowing. All that needs to be realised here is that when there is great light there is great darkness and vice versa. The lord spits out the mediocre and the lukewarm but sets on fire that which burns in the darkest places after Him.
The girls have moved on now and I remain sitting here on the back porch, hair crispy, beautiful warm breeze licking my face. They sat and talked and played with my hair which I sat here, beautiful beautiful beautiful ones. I almost wish I could just speak to someone outside of here to get a reality check that this isnt all some kinda vision or dream! I need to know this is real, sort out my head, understand somehow. There is a massive breakthrough coming in my spirit, I feel it, i know that mcuh, but i dont know how or why or what from or when.
So I cry that which is embedded in my heart to cry for the rest of eternity until I am perfected with Him. More Lord, break me, mold me, use me, gill me, our me out, wreck me, pour me out, pour me out. I have no other words. I wish I did. But I dont. Me and Jesus need to spend some time I think. x
6 hours after it began, church and baptismo's finished and we ate rice and beans. I sit outside, Esperanza to my left (shes my girl that I have bonded so closely with, such depth and haunting beauty but such hidden pain and torment, oh Jesus), the Pemba breeze slowly licking my drying sea hair, shell shocked, overwhelmed, not understanding, not knowing what comes next, only knowing i love the girl to my left, the kids to my right, the group behind me and the place they call Pemba and Arco-Iris. If there was a significance to all those rainbows, maybe this was it, i do not know. What do i know? I have been here 27hours and I have gone form numb and surreal to ....something and surreal! This morning, we had church, we worshipped, watched kids on their faces, literally, praising Jesus, danced, prayed, joyed...mama aida spoke of testimonys of what she has seen the lord do healings and such and then did an altar call before we all went to the beach for the three hour baptism service.
In short, everyone who was baptised, kids from 6-15 yrs, adults, me and mum and some other visitors, by mama Aida were ALL overcome by the presence and spirit of God on return out of the water, right there an then in the sea. Previous baptisees floated away in the arsm of others, oblivious to all but the love and joy of Jesus in response to their death to flesh and commitment of their lives to Him. Before long my spirit had quickened and God called me to get in the water which for some reason really scared me, i think the last dregsof demons were creaming at me to run away but I didnt wann be caught up by them, nor was i gonna be caught up in legalism having already been baptised aged 12. God told me to jump into the waters of his love and blessing and burial, so i did. What love mama Aida posesses! In so mcuh as whenever anyone is near her, they wanna be loved, they love, thye seek healing and receive it, they share testimony, they love. She spoke over me that God makes all things new and that today was a new day hallelujah :) As I came up fromt he water the Spirit...oh the Spirit took over and I shook and felt Him so deep inside I was overwhelmed and could do nothing but float in Heidis arms are she spoke in the langauges of heaven over me and kissed my head. Then i was enveloped in His joy, it consumed me, i laughed, glowed according to three different people who later sought me out to tell me! Oh but how to keep a hold of it, permamnce Lord! Dont let this just be a break in the clouds! I wont let it be! my life has changed, let it never ever go back to how it was. Mum was baptised too, we have pics of both which i will try and figure out how to blog, she glowed as well, physically glowed. :)
This is the point at which nothing else can be verbalised or explained. I sit here numb and yet full of emotion, unsure right now how to keep this, how to not let it slip, how to even process what just happened, what it means int he course of my life....God is doing great works between me and my mom on this trip as well, I look forward to seeing the Lord being greater revelation love and breakthrough with us.
Beyond all of this though, beyond my current thoughts about future,, i observe what I see here, i watch mama aida, i feel what God poured into me today and I am left with a profound and life changing question. How do we love, no matter wat, when or who, with the love and passion of Christ?
There is more wrestling in me but I leave it within me so that the LOrd can minster and answer.
Below I have written some tesimonys from this morning although I also include a diary entry after this one from Heidi about this morning.
-woman told by doctor to eat her family to get well (by witch doctor) didnt, instead asked Jesus and was healed
- man alcoholic then had aids then DIED...raised from the dead and well
- deaf hearing
- alcoholic cured
- sickness cured
- one woman came to Christ and her family so scared that the demons would kill them as a result (she was delivered).
That is not the greatest measure of stories I have heard and testimony to the drak and light contrast here, but ther are somethings it is worth not knowing. All that needs to be realised here is that when there is great light there is great darkness and vice versa. The lord spits out the mediocre and the lukewarm but sets on fire that which burns in the darkest places after Him.
The girls have moved on now and I remain sitting here on the back porch, hair crispy, beautiful warm breeze licking my face. They sat and talked and played with my hair which I sat here, beautiful beautiful beautiful ones. I almost wish I could just speak to someone outside of here to get a reality check that this isnt all some kinda vision or dream! I need to know this is real, sort out my head, understand somehow. There is a massive breakthrough coming in my spirit, I feel it, i know that mcuh, but i dont know how or why or what from or when.
So I cry that which is embedded in my heart to cry for the rest of eternity until I am perfected with Him. More Lord, break me, mold me, use me, gill me, our me out, wreck me, pour me out, pour me out. I have no other words. I wish I did. But I dont. Me and Jesus need to spend some time I think. x
posted by Claire at 3:44 PM
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