I write all that is below because I feel I should share a glimpse, and that is all it is, of what I have come home from. I share it with you not to make you jealous, but to create within you a longing for the things of God. We are too content. Thats what was revealed to me this morning at church, I called people to hunger, thirst, longing, to want to chase after Him, to see His words bear fruit. Read what God has said He will do, read what Jesus said about Himself and his kingdom and our authority, read it and then declare it. We are living with the bar set too low, we are far too satisfied and content with where we are and the tiny things we are asking for. How big is your God? I ask again, how big is your God? Sit under His waterfall, ask for Him to fill you so that you might be brimming, that you might be poured out to everyone you come into contact with. Stop being comfortable and satisfied. Divine discontent. I dare you to pray for it ;)

Saturday, June 02, 2007

Authority

As I sat down to write this talk about authority I looked forward to discovering the original meanings of the word “authority”, in divulging amazing revelation about what it means in contexts within the bible, looking at the authority of God, of Jesus, of us. I had decided to study about praying in Jesus’ name, casting out demons and performing many miracles. I had set the agenda by which I would talk, it was gonna be full of building up, power-filled, us conquering the world kinda stuff. It was going to be about authority.

I wrote five pages. God scrapped the lot.

He asked me very gently a question which changed this talk, changed it from my agenda to his. I am aware that it is therefore not the bog standard teaching on authority talk, but it is what I believe the Lord asked me study.

He asked me who was in authority over me.

Recently I have been struggling so hard with control or lack of it within my life. 21 is one of those pivotal ages whereby everything is changing, nothing is stable and life is turned upside down. Whereas before, I am one of those people who plans things a year in advance, now I do not even know the outcome of the day I sit in let alone where in the world – literally, I will be next year. All my life I have had control of situations, I have been able to ask the Lord his plans, and work through them myself. Until now. This past week he has taken me and removed every shred of authority and control I have had over my own life until I had nothing left. It is this he asked me to talk about.

For someone or something to have authority over you, it has power, command, control, strength and might. It determines what you do and when you do it, it sets out how you achieve things and what opportunities you will and will not have. What is in authority over us? I am aware that the instant response is that God is in authority over us and as we decide to give our lives to him, this is certainly true. However, I propose that there are three other things that can take that place, that can determine what we do, how we do it and therefore take the place of our dear Lord in controlling, determining and running our lives.

The first is timing. be it over money, our job, our situation, house, ministry or opportunities. 2 Peter 2:19 says “..a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him.”. Are we slaves to our own time agendas?

I have personally struggled with this recently, jobs and house security causing great worry and stress. I can find myself saying “I know you can provide Lord, but I just don’t know it any more.” In saying that, what I was really saying to the Lord was “I believe in the concept of you, I also even believe that you exist and can do this. But I am terrified that your plans are gonna be different to mine and think you need a bit of help bringing about the promises you told me, into fruition.” All too many times have I found myself trying to “help” the Lord provide money, a job, a house etc. Only yesterday has this been a massive struggle and he reminded me of something that happened the summer before I came to university.

He knows far better than we ever do. At the end of the day, if he has planned the end, he will plan the means and if he hasn’t planned the end that you are heading for, then praise him when the means don’t appear so that you can be living in the fullness of the plans he has for you. The great, abundant and fulfilling promises and plans far beyond what you could ever comprehend or dream. I asked a question of the Lord, actually I was whining at him big time about something and he said “ok, have it your way”. Instantly I remembered all those situations when I have thought I knew best. I didn’t, I don’t. God knows me far better than I ever will and I know that whatever is his will, then that is the absolute best for me for who would ask his father for bread and be given a snake? How much more does our father in heaven love and provide for us? I have been reminded not to forget the past and to know that God knows what we need, clothes, food, all of it. Matthew 6 is famous for telling us the non-need of worrying. And yet we try and grab back control over all the things in our lives that we own, have and are trying to get.

The second thing that can have huge authority over our lives is other people and fear of man. I am constantly challenged by the thought, If we truly lived in the knowledge and the identity of children of God, if we truly lived as his bond servants alone. Then what the world said or did or thought would have no bearing on us whatsoever. It took me over a year to have the guts to kneel in church, why? I was terrified as to what people might think of me, maybe it was the wrong time, maybe they don’t do it like that here….who am I kneeling for again? People around us have the level of control over us that we give them. No more, no less. Its just that we so very often forget that.

Lastly, more than anyone else, I have realised the person with the most authority over my life up until recently was…me. Yeah I gave my life to Christ young and he directs everything I do and say…up to a point, it has always been comfortable and it has always involved plans I liked. That is until recently. What I realised was during a time of fasting which taught me oh so much…I remembered something that was said in a sermon a while back…

The analogy was of the Lord driving with us in a car…where would he be? Without thinking, I replied in my head, he would be in the passenger seat with me, The front one mind, where I can speak with him and he can direct me etc

It never even occurred to me he could be anywhere else in that image, it was great, we would natter and he would tell me where to go and what to do and I would drive us.

HOWEVER, what if he was to truly take the driving seat? I thought and thought about this concept and it started to terrify me. I’d have no idea where I was going, no control over speed or avoiding obstacles, I would be completely at his mercy and everything would be up to him.

I know that personally I know and think that He is always in the driving seat and directing everything fully. However, if I completely honest as the Lord has asked me to be… I also know that this isn’t true. He is in control up to the point where I let him be. He is in jurisdiction over stuff as long as it is in line with what I wanted in the first place.

We know that in Jesus we see the image of God and therefore strive to emulate his actions and morality within our own lives. Well, in John 5:30 Jesus himself states “..I have no desire to do what is pleasing to myself…but only the will and pleasure of the Father who sent me..”. The one person with infinite authority over heaven and earth, the ability to say and do anything beyond our comprehension and yet without the Father’s direct will, he would do nothing. The bible describes us as bond servants. These are servants who are bound to their master for (I think) 7 years. They have an earring hammered into their ear as a sign of their loyalty and their lives are lived purely to do whatever they can for the master. we are bond servants of Christ, we were crucified with him and therefore raised up with him into new lives completely controlled by him.

John 15: 4-8

“Dwell in me and I will dwell in you. Just as no branch can bear fruit by itself without abiding in (being VITALLY UNITED to) the vine, neither can you bear fruit unless you abide in me. I am the Vine, you are the branches. Whoever lives in me and I in him, bears much abundant fruit. However, apart from me, you can do nothing…If you live in Me and My WORDS remain in you and continue to live in your hearts, ask whatever you will and it shall be done for you. When you bear fruit, My Father is honoured and glorified and you show and prove yourselves to be true followers of mine.”

As I thought further about the car scenario, truly freaking out about the ramifications of letting God entirely lose on my plans, I was lead to one concrete conclusion …

If Jesus was in the drivers seat I would sit and face him, if I didn’t know where I was going I wouldn’t even watch. I would just enjoy the ride, I’d talk with him, giggle and sing car songs with him, every so often asking where we were going but delighting and laughing when he winked and said “it’s a surprise!”

Matt 16:24-26 [MSG] says

“…Anyone who intends to come with me HAS to let ME lead. You’re not in the drivers seat I AM...Follow me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, My way, to finding yourself, your true self. What kind of deal is it to get everything you want but lose yourself? What could you ever trade your soul for?…”

What has authority over us? What is it we are giving power in our lives?

As I prayed over this talk…seeing as it completely didn’t turn out how I’d planned, the Lord told me;

To receive God’s authority and power…we must let go of our own.

I have a million notes about the authority he has given us and that which we walk in, our inheritance form God, our co-heir identity with our beautiful saviour. But without first surrendering ourselves, dying to every fleshly bit of ourselves and abandoning ourselves to Gods authority, it cannot move through us effectively because we are not letting us.

“For even if I boast somewhat freely about the authority the Lord gave us for building up rather than pulling down, I will not be ashamed of it.” (2 Corinthians 10:8)

How afraid are we of letting go of plans and things? How ashamed are we of who we are in Christ around those people we see every day? How much do we boast in that which God has given us? God has challenged me very personally with this one.

This has been such a personal struggle and challenge that the Lord has asked me to share that I felt it appropriate to finish by sharing a journal entry from a while ago when I knew less than I did now, no idea as to the plans for the Lord, house, job, America, living, friends, husband, any of it.

Right now I am treading middle ground. I am lukewarm. Not in my love and praise, prayer or worship of my almighty king. But with my frivolous life. If He doesn’t exist, I am wasting so many hours preaching, praying, worshipping that I could be spending raising money to achieve what I wish to achieve in life, where I wish to go, doing what I want to do before it is too late. BUT If he is real, of which I am more than convinced, then this time I am spending striving, trying to figure it out, trying to formulate a plan, trying to be in control, trying to tell God where I want to visit and live…I am wasting my time. If I have truly heard the call of God on my life, if I truly meant what I said when I first told the Lord he could use me and that my life was ENTIRELY in his hands, then I must die to flesh. Actually, painfully, humbly, scarily, really (not just in our wonderful “spiritual imaginations/minds”) but in REALITY – die to my flesh and wait to see where he would send me.

Am I willing to broaden my horizons? Can I trust him in where he would send me? Can I truly stop becoming self focused and fix my eyes upon the beautiful face of the Lord?

I am surrendering control. Daily, hourly, minutely. I am consciously choosing to die to myself because I know with all my heart that He is worth far more than all of me.

2 Comments:

Blogger annaswaiting said...

i probably honestly won't know about december for a while, sorry girl. i'm kind of a last minute person, not to mention, i have no idea what my life or finances will look like that far in advance. if i have the extra money and find a cheap fare this summer, i'll book it, if not... we'll just have to see what happens. but i'll let you know when i know, just don't hold your breath... cause, i don't know! hehe, thanks. shanay

5:19 PM  
Blogger jeanne said...

Wow! I am always so blown away by your writings. I am moved and challegend and encouraged all at the same time. I wanna let god be in the driving seat and I know I am a terrible back seat driver! Its all about trust isnt it! I will try and am learning to let Him have all of me and lead me where ever He is calling me. It's scary but I know that With Him is the best place to be. Thank you for sharing this and for being such an encouragement.
I love you!
Jeanne

4:27 PM  

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